Flash Flood Wipes Out Junkyard, Neighbors Ecstatic
By Sue Rentchler
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Housewife Invents Better Mousetrap, Patent Lawyers Beat A Path To His Door
An Investigative Report
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Local Woman Invents Better Mousetrap, Patent Lawyers Beat A Path To His Door
Special to the Minnesotan Freedom-Leader
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Austin University Study Finds Acme Bag-O-Rusty-Nails(tm) Caused 161 Deaths Last Year
A Special Report
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Also in this issue:
Page 4A: Switzerland Invades Leichtenstein, 132 Killed
Page 6A: Richard Nixon Grade School To Require Uniforms, Students Plan To Strike
Page 9A: "Shakespeare Was Right: Let's Kill All The Lawyers" Says Columnist Elena Eriksson
Page 1C: Colts Safety Hunter Hetz Placed On Disabled List
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Area Man Loses Life Savings In Las Vegas Gambling Junket
"We'll be talking about this for years", exclaims observer.
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Nuclear War Kills 6 Billion People, Only 3 Billion Roaches & 2 Newspaper Journalists Survive
Exclusive Report
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Michelle Gregory and Suzanne Gambon Declared "Town Drunks" By South Glade City Council
"We'll be talking about this for years", exclaims observer.
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"Why Does Everybody Hog The Left Lane On The Interstate?" Says Columnist Alvin Haché
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